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the best mother fucking chicken matzo ball wheat egg noodle barley carrot onion celery soup. EVER. 
15th-May-2007 04:54 pm
Ten Lick
and it goes like
this:

Into a v.large pot, throw some butter and saute a wee bit of garlic (garlic salt need not apply). When the garlic is kinda sorta sauteed (and if you don't think about the Paulie slicing up the garlic scene in Goodfellas while you are doing this, we cannot be friends), fill up the v.large pot with enough water so that the whole roaster chicken (giblets removed and don't forget to rinse the chickee cause grocery stores like to use bleach on them, or so I'm told) you bought will happily take a bath. Chickees like to take hot baths. 'specially if you quarter a sweet vidalia onion and throw that in with em.

Put the chickee into the pot and get the bath water to boiling, then reduce and cover to simmer for about an hour. At this point, I remove the chickee from the bath and let him cool in a giant bowl and I go play Oblivion for an hour or so. Then I come back and then mix up my matzo ball..er .. mix that comes in a soup mix/matzo ball mix that I found in the kosher/international aisle at any grocery store. While that's chilling in the fridge for 15 minutes, I take all the good meat off the chickee and throw it back in the pot. Mostly breast meat, but I'll pick the dark meat too if I'm in the mood. (And I dispose of the rest of the chicken down the street amongst the trees for the cat that runs around whose name is Lopper because when we first moved in, I would find dead mice on the road with ... dun dun dun...their heads gone).

Add the matzo ball soup mix to the soup and while it's heating up to boil, make your matzo balls according to directions on the box. s'fun. I sometimes eat the dough cause I'm a dough eater. Once the soup is boiling vigorously, drop your matzo balls in, cover, and reduce the heat to simmer. Don't open the lid to check out your balls cause they like the steam. In exactly 12 minutes, add x amount of whole wheat egg noodles, a big fat generous amount of barley, a whole lotta carrots, and celery. For teh crunch. Cover again. 8 minutes later, your soup, she is done.

Oh, it's so good but it always tastes better the next day. And? The day after that. Really, it's good for lunch or dinner for the whole week.
Comments 
15th-May-2007 09:30 pm (UTC)
I'm making some this weekend!

And ehehehe. I like the commentary!

I am a dough eater too.
15th-May-2007 09:34 pm (UTC)
yay! Wait...you're just going to use chicken breasts, aren't you? Instead of a whole chicken. Right? Why do I think that I can't remember.


The only thing that calls for any sort of precision measurement is the matzo ball mix. The rest is all throw and toss and eyeball. But don't throw or toss your eyeball. Cause owie. That would hurt like it hurt when I was trying to put some bronzer on my face this morning and accidentally whipped the brush across my eye. I think that's a Do Not in one of those How To Put On Makeup articles.

i got some dough for you to eat right here.
15th-May-2007 09:50 pm (UTC)
Yeah, I probably am. Because I don't like the idea of all of that gristle and bone and scary stuff in my soup, even if it gets removed. Yeah, I'm a freak of nature. LOVE ME ANYWAY!

Precision with the matzo ball mix. Check. I can do that. And ew! And OW! You poor thing. That's one of the reasons why I don't wear makeup (aside from the fact that pretty much all of it makes my skin asplode): the high probability of eye death.


Is it a fistful of dough?
15th-May-2007 09:53 pm (UTC)
Honestly? None of that shit ends up in it. If it did, I would throw the whole damn thing out. I'm not a fan of picking the meat off the bone, but at least that way I have complete control over what exactly is in my soup. My mom is far less cautious than I and I have to pick shit out of it and when she's not looking, I fling it at her.

Also, I tried it once with just chicken breasts (since that's all I really use) and the flavor doesn't even come close for some reason as it does when you use a whole chicken. Aaaaaand a whole chicken is cheaper. If you have a big enough pot, you can get a good sized whole roaster for under $5 and you get so much meat the soup is more like a stew.


in my pants.

15th-May-2007 09:57 pm (UTC)
Okay. I believe you and I will do it your way because I believe you.

And ah. Good point. I have a crock-pot. Will it work in a crock-pot?!?


Then that's where i'll be.
16th-May-2007 12:38 pm (UTC)
let me just add that I do have a big fat strainer spoon that I sweep round my soup a couple of times after I take the whole chicken out. Just in case something falls in.


I have never used a crockpot in my life. Sure! :D

fantastic.
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